Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-5613590-20131210070245

This tale was inspired by real life events....

I spotted a potential hollow's lair, high atop Sen's Fortress. I quietly inched my way forward, more out of curiosity than anything, with my lure heald steadily in my hand. I examined the best spot to use the lure, deciding on a nice big patch of web. I place the lure and begin to gently wiggle it. Perhaps only three seconds go by before I spot the hollow.

Wait...hollows aren't that big. I keep wig- quickly jump back as a big, black, hairy demon charges at my lure. Retreating as soon as it appeared, perhaps it was frightened by my vicious, high-pitched, war cry?

I decide to head back to the bonfire to get a weapon big enough for this demon, a heavy and toxic flamethrower. I notice this demon had badly damaged the lure I was using, so I grabbed another before heading back to face the demon. On the way, I decided I'd dub it the "Great Eight."

I place the lure and wiggle it, my throat beginning to feel hot and dry. I hold my toxic flamethrower high at the ready... ah! Half of the Great Eight is out, examining its fake prey, I flinched only ever so slightly. I flinch a bit more when the beast darts down the hall, but only stops halfway. That is close enough to get a good shot, so I quickly check that my toxic flamethrower is set to "high" and BLAST THE MOTHER WITH FULL FOR- I jump back again and let another terrifying, vicious, high-pitched war cry, as the demon recoils from my mighty toxin spitting machine.

I cautiously step towards the spot where it had just been, only to find that it is fleeing through the window! Seeing it that it was going up, I raced down Sen's Fortress and outside, to find no sign of the eight-legged monster crawling up it's sturdy walls. I head back inside past a few hollows, checking every room and window on the way for any sign of the wounded beast.

Just as I was clearing the last floor, I spot the Great Eight cowering in a corner, seemingly unaware of my presence at the window. I decided that the beast was in range, and released another deadly shot of toxic fire, smiling as I watched the beast squirm away from the window. I let out another quick shot, only for it to miss completely. Noticing there is a door, I race around some yet unexplored parts of Sen's Fortress, searching for a way in.

I wasn't about to lose hope, and all the searching eventually paid off. I stumble across the door, to find the half of the Great Eight hanging outside a different window, its long, black limbs struggling feebly. I smile to myself, as I bid him farewell with another dose of toxic flamethrower. "Adios. Arkadashim."

long story short: I killed a spider.

Hollows ~ are the small spiders that aren't scary enough to kill.

Bonfire ~ my house

Sen's Fortress ~ my backyard balcony/porch, or watever you call it, some wooden stairs lead to the ground. each stair is each floor, lol

Adios ~ "bye"

Arkadashim ~ "my friend" in Turkish.

Look at mah kill (compared to average chewing gum) ~ 