Board Thread:Dark Souls II/@comment-216.81.81.81-20140321044842/@comment-76.16.163.123-20140906154244

If you killed Pate, you'll have to wait a certain amount of REAL time for his tombstone to appear. When that does appear, pay the required amount of souls to "talk" to the ghost of Pate. Exhaust the conversation, he'll give you the big white soapstone.

If you defeated the area bosses you'll only be able to summon players INTO YOUR game via small soapstone. If you still have a boss you can summon via soapstones.